October 20, 2025
Day 5 – First Ceremony at Munay Sonqo
Today I woke up in Ollantaytambo, and last night it rained a lot. It rained pretty hard, and I could hear the rain on the kind of tin corrugated roof because the house I was staying in was open to the outside, so I could hear the rain while I slept. But when I woke up, it was clear and cold. I went outside and said good morning to the mountains, and I saw how everything looked in the rising light. I noticed how the sky in the east was lighter, and I thought about all of the dwellings built into the side of the mountain, and how the sun shining on them at different times of the year lets the people know what time of year it is.
I packed up my stuff and then headed out to try and get some breakfast and buy some water. I was able to buy water, but I wasn’t able to get breakfast — it was too hard to find something. Then I walked back up, and this five-block cobblestone pathway was just so hard for me every single time. It’s a little easier going down than coming back up because it’s uphill, but it was really activating my plantar fasciitis. It was just so challenging for me.
And then I was feeling really rigid about timing, and Tiburicio wasn’t at my door at 9:45 on the dot with the cart to carry my baggage, so I got a little antsy and messaged Doña Catty. Then he was on his way, and again, he was so much faster than me even with the cart and my bag.
But I got to my taxi, and my taxi driver—I forgot his name—was really great. He drove me to Munay Sonqo, and it was a very interesting drive. It really felt like sprawling suburbs, kind of. There were some bigger towns mixed in, but the whole way there were just so many homes, so many people, so many little businesses, so much farming.
And then the road into Munay Sonqo was crazy. It was so narrow, and we kept having to back up to let cars pass. The driver—I feel like his name might’ve been Ronaldo or something like that—kept saying, “It’s okay. It’s Peru. It’s okay. It’s Peru. You’re in Peru.” And I just thought that was so funny.
We finally made it, but there was literally a huge tractor tearing up the street outside the retreat center, and we couldn’t pass. It was so crazy. But we got there. I got my bag, checked into my room, and had a really good meal for lunch. Then I put everything away, took a nap, and the first ayahuasca ceremony started at 5 PM.
I held my medicine and prayed, and then at the right moment, I drank it. It was not bad—I was expecting it to be worse. It wasn’t as tasty as the medicine at Path of the Huachuma, but it was much better than peyote. I welcomed the medicine to my body, prayed for all the help I need, asked for gentle, kindness.
And it was really beautiful. The first thing that happened was that my grandma Helen came to me. Without a word, she just started pouring so much love—down my throat, into my body—and it was just like, okay, this is the moment where you’re going to take all of this love and open to it and receive it and be it. Every part of your body is going to be open to all of this love.
And then there were so many beautiful moments. George was there, and it was like everyone I know who’s sat with ayahuasca came to me. There was this moment where the medicine was so strong, and I understood that all I have to do is breathe in and out. That’s my human job—just breathe in and breathe out and let it happen. I understood that it’s my job to take care of my body, and let the medicine do the best.
I literally felt pinned down to the floor as the as part of the medicine that was doing the work on my body did its thing. It was so intense and so bright. I understood psychedelic art like never before. I kept thinking I could do something to make it better or easier, and I just kept getting this message: your job is to breathe in and breathe out.
And then at some point, I got well—and every time I got well, I peed. My pants were wet, the blanket was wet, everything was wet. But I got well. I got out what I needed to get out. Then I was able to take it to the bathroom, get rid of it, and move on. I felt mostly comfortable in my body after that.
There were so many realizations. There was a woman next to me who was kind of whimpering for most of the ceremony, and I realized—oh, that’s me. I’m this whimpering child. I spent a lot of time just loving her, loving my whimpering child, saying, oh, it’s okay. Yes, good job. You’re my precious baby.
There was this whole understanding about grandmother and mother and daughter and baby and ancestor. The medicine was showing me that I can’t escape the mother part. I don’t have a baby, but I am a mother—and I will be a grandmother too. I get to be that mother to myself, and that grandmother to myself. The medicine is that mother and that grandmother.
I felt so much compassion for my grandmothers and mothers and babies and ancestors, and such a deep understanding of the power of lineage.
Then there were the going-in moments and the going-out moments. At some point I walked outside and saw the mountains and the stars. I felt like every single one of the stars saw me, and I saw them. The mountain saw me, and I saw the mountain. I felt the connection and worthiness and validation and love and attention—it’s everywhere, all around me.
There were definitely parts of the ceremony where I felt connection with men in my life that I love but don’t feel their love back in the same way. But I understood that we shared something real that really matters. And all that matters is that it matters to me—that I value that connection—but that I don’t get lost in it, don’t veer off track, don’t stop taking care of my body, don’t stop breathing in and breathing out, and allowing my heart to open and heal.
It’s so easy to get stuck, get angry, get upset, and want things I’m not getting—but it’s all okay.
The icaros were amazing, and all of the sounds were amazing. It was really beautiful, and I felt really taken care of. Everything’s okay.
And then I was kind of done, you know, so I went back to my room—and now I’m going to sleep.
Good night.
Dear pachamama, love, all my spirit guides, everyone who wishes me well, ayahuasca and all plant medicines, what would you have me know today?
Walk in beauty my love, walk in beauty everyday all the time. Your big, beautiful heart shines always. You can be as you are, come as you are, open, soften, and allow.
This is your time to have the healing be all about you. Let yourself be healed fully, completely and in a way the brings joy, nourishment and love forward.
Your body will heal and let go. Let it. Receive the help. Ask for help. Receive the help. Walk in beauty. The world is beautiful and reflects your beauty back to you.
Listen to the mountains. Be with all of you. You are held, you have so much support, so many spirits love you. Let yourself be seen and loved and known.
Walk in beauty. Love yourself. Soften, open, allow, breathe, love. Don’t force, just be, go slow. You have shown up. You already did all the work, enjoy the ride.
Love you.
Travel Details
AirBnb check out 10am.
Ollantaytambo to Arin – Munay Sonqo Retreat
Taxi to Retreat Center – Arranged by host
Estimate: Ollantaytambo → Munay Sonqo
Because Ollantaytambo is further away from the retreat than places nearer Cusco, the drive will be somewhat longer. Here’s a rough estimate:
- Distance: Likely somewhere around 30–40 km or more (depending on exact route)
- Drive time: ~ 45 minutes to 1 hour in good conditions (on paved + dirt roads)
- Vehicle requirement: A decent car (ideally 4×4 or high clearance) for dirt road segments
Estimated cost
Rates will depend on the type of vehicle, whether you hire a private taxi or shared transport, road difficulty, and local pricing. Here’s a rough ballpark:
- For a private car / taxi for that route, you might expect S/ 80–150 soles (≈ US 25–40) or more, depending on how remote the last leg is and whether 4×4 is needed
- If part of a retreat group package, transport might already be included (or partially included) in the retreat cost
Munay Sonqo Retreat and Yoga center located at NRO. 03 Sector LLAMACCYA ROSACABALERAYOC PARCELA 03 ARIN 08120
Arrival time 11:30am –