October 21, 2025
Day 6 – San Pedro Ceremony
Last night, I woke up around 2:30 and again at 4:30, but I actually slept pretty well considering it was the night after the ayahuasca ceremony.
This morning there wasn’t breakfast, but there was tea at seven. Around 7:30, I went to get some coca tea, and the San Pedro ceremony started at 8 AM. Everyone was pretty much in the same spots as the night before. For a second, I thought they had switched out my blanket — I think they changed the sheet, but my blanket still kind of smelled like pee. It didn’t actually smell that bad, but still, it was kind of gross. So I might try to swap it out next time.
There won’t be another ceremony until Thursday evening, so we have tonight, tomorrow, and the next full day off. That’s going to be interesting — what am I going to do?
For the San Pedro ceremony, everyone lined up to get their little plastic cup. I don’t think I mentioned this yesterday, but it was so surprising to me that the medicine — both ayahuasca and San Pedro — comes in big plastic water bottles. For some reason, I had imagined it would be in a more beautiful container, out of respect. But I can also see that the native people here are less precious about things like that. It’s not the same as the “beauty way.” It’s just different. The medicine is the medicine.
The cup I received of San Pedro was pretty different from what I’m used to — more soupy and definitely brown, not see-through. I’m very curious how it’s made. It was strong. I just had the one small cup, and I started to feel it right away. It was clear to me that I was going to get well at some point.
I think I was the first one in the ceremony to get well. Luckily it wasn’t as intense as the ayahuasca, but I did get well — one time, but three strong heaves. I think I handled it pretty well. Then I got up, cleared my bucket, washed it out, came back, and was fine for the rest of the ceremony. I actually felt really good.
Teachings from the Maestro
There was a lot of talking today by Maestro Hamilton. He had so much to share about being. He said that when he first came to the Amazon, the Maestros he studied with would talk about the mountain being, the tree being, the animal being — that everything is a being, not an object.
He talked about how, when you see a flower, instead of objectifying it and saying it’s beautiful, you can just say hello — see your reflection in it — and not be separate from it, or from any part of the cosmos.
There was a lot of expansion and heart opening. I really felt that strongly.
Something he said that I loved was his mantra:
“There will never be a single reason in the entire cosmos to close my heart.”
I think I got that right. It landed deeply. That there could never be a single reason to close my heart. I know that’s easier said than done, but it was such a profound teaching. I’ve definitely had moments where I’ve threatened to close my heart, and this helped me remember that I don’t have to.
The Ceremony Space
There was coca tea, cacao, and water available. In the dining area, people could get fruit — pear, apple, mango, watermelon, pineapple, papaya — every amazing kind of fruit.
About an hour in, they invited us to get fruit or snacks. There was gluten-free bread, rice cakes, peanut butter, and butter. So throughout the day, I had a couple bowls of fruit and a few slices of gluten-free bread with really delicious peanut butter. I had several cups of coca tea, and I tried some cacao, but I wasn’t really feeling it.
People were encouraged to walk around, be outside, come and go from the ceremony as they pleased — so I did.
It was such a beautiful day. The mountains were incredible. The clouds were incredible.
The ceremony space is this huge circular room, with about three-quarters of it made of floor-to-ceiling glass windows that open. Most of the ceiling is skylights, so you can see the clouds and the mountains. I had a really good spot, not in the sun, which I appreciated.
I had so many beautiful moments today. My heart felt so open. I felt so connected to everything — so expansive.
Sanctuary and the Plants
At one point, I noticed that some people in the ceremony were taking their own hapé, and I was kind of surprised. The person next to me offered some to Maestro Hamilton. I don’t know if that started it, but then he began talking about what he calls Sanctuary — the difference between his training in the jungle, where he was only allowed to work with very specific plants for years, and his realization later that all the plant medicines love each other.
He said they have no problem with each other and love to work together. It reminded me of what George always said about the medicines — that they love each other and want to collaborate. I think that’s really beautiful.
As the ceremony went on, Hamilton was kind of moving in and out of this dialogue with God. He kept saying things like, “Come on, Gaia. Come on, God,” almost like challenging God — let’s do better, let’s rise higher.
It didn’t really resonate with me because I was in this place of feeling so expansive, so not separate from everything — just open. He was very passionate, exploring things that people often have hard feelings about, but I needed space, so I walked around the grounds.
I didn’t find the pool (I want to), but I did find a couple of sweat lodges up at the top of the property, and a shaded spot with hammocks. I lay in one for a long time. It was so comforting to just be rocked there. I think I got a bug bite, but it was worth it.
It was such a gorgeous day — warm, alive, and full of light.
Evening Reflections
When I went back to the ceremony room around 3:30, things were winding down. It was fascinating to feel how different this was from the Medicine Path tradition. It was pretty much all Hamilton talking — which I didn’t mind, it was just very different.
Afterward, people were free to go whenever they wanted. Some left and didn’t come back. I left around 4:00, went back to my room, took a shower, and felt refreshed.
After the Ceremony
After the San Pedro ceremony, I took a shower, changed my clothes, and walked around a little bit. I actually found the pool and spa area, which sits at the edge of the resort with a really beautiful view.
But I also felt kind of antsy and anxious — not sure what to do with myself after such a beautiful and intense 24 hours. I thought maybe I’d take my laptop and try to get some work done, but there’s no Wi-Fi in my room, so I went down to the dining hall to log on. Then I realized I’d forgotten my glasses, and even if I’d had them, I realized how silly it was to try to work after all of that.
It felt like a way of trying to shut down the experience I’d just had and go back to my “normal” self — that part of me that thinks I have to get things done, do things for my clients, be productive.
I think I’ll do a little bit of work today in the afternoon since we have the day off, and I have a massage this morning that I’m looking forward to.
Dinner was at 6 o’clock. As I headed there, I noticed people were still in the ceremony room — some had obviously been there all day. I must have left around four, so another several hours had passed. That was fine. A lot of people were sharing their experiences of the San Pedro. Everyone noticed that I was the first to get well, and some said I did it very gracefully.
Dinner was really good — trout, mashed potatoes, beautiful lettuces with papaya dressing, a couscous salad, and maybe something else I can’t remember. The food here is so delicious and nourishing. I feel so good after eating it and so blessed to have such wholesome meals.
After dinner, I stayed a while. Hamilton talked more — this time about his experiences on airplanes, which apparently have been wild. He said he’s been on planes that have crashed, or had broken landing gear, or been delayed by governments. So many situations. He said he now calls on Archangel Michael to help fly the planes he’s on, and since then, there’ve been no problems.
He talked about his guides and angels and his dragons — apparently he has a dragon of every color. These are guides and beings that help him in the ayahuasca realms. It’s all very interesting to me.
But I do get the sense that he really loves to talk — and that he has a lot to say. People ask him questions, and he answers in long, winding stories. I understand and feel that he’s wise, very intelligent, powerful from a place of extensive experience, and very well-respected. I can feel myself wanting him to like me or be interested in me — but I also feel a healthy hesitation and desire to stay grounded in myself.
I’m here to experience the medicine. I trust him to lead the ceremonies in a good way, especially the ayahuasca. Even though I’ve been aware of him and following his work for almost 20 years, I’m taking it all very slowly, bit by bit, not fully immersing myself in the group energy.
A lot of people here have sat with him before and keep coming back. He’s clearly very experienced and knowledgeable, fully himself. I like how he says that he trusts the Ayahuasca and the San Pedro more than anything else. I feel that too.
It’s been really interesting to have conversations with others here — hearing about their experiences, making connections. I did more of that at dinner, then went back to my room and went to bed around nine.
Night Under the Stars
I woke up several times during the night and remembered reading that there was supposed to be a meteor shower visible anywhere in the world. My room has skylights above the bed. When I first went to sleep, it was cloudy and I couldn’t see any stars.
But at one point, I woke up and it was clear. I saw stars. I thought, I’m going to get up and go outside to look.
I put on my clothes, my hat, and jacket, and the second I opened my door, Hamilton and his dog were walking by. We said hello — that’s pretty much the extent of our interactions. During the ceremony yesterday, he had said, “Bless you, soul sister,” and he was grateful for the Agua de Florida I brought him. That surprised me too — I thought more people would bring gifts of medicine, but it’s just a different tradition.
So I feel his awareness of me, and I think he feels my hesitation too. I’m here to have my own experience.
I walked out to the pool and spa area and lay down on one of the outdoor couches, looking up at the sky. I’m not sure how long I was there — maybe half an hour. It was so clear. So many stars. So many bright ones. The mountains silhouetted in the dark, a few clouds drifting through.
I saw four shooting stars — small, but spectacular. It felt powerful to just witness them, to look up into that vastness. I haven’t really seen the stars of the southern hemisphere before, and it was beautiful.
Then I went back to bed and slept until about six. When I woke, I got up for breakfast.
Message from stars over Peru at 3am
We are falling.
Falling in love with you.
We fall in love because you woke up, got out of bed, got dressed, and came to say hello.
You see us and we see you. This moment you say hello in recognition of our shared participation in the cosmos instead of being awe struck and full of wonder.
It’s wonderful to wonder, and it’s different to just know. We are family. Now in this moment. Forever from before and forever in the future. It cannot and would not ever be undone.
We’re the same thread, the same soul, the same water, the same matter, the same space.
You understand relatives now. You are letting the knowing settle deeper and deeper into your consciousness. We are so happy for us.
We like to be seen and known as the relatives we are. The truth feels true. In your heart, you always knew this was true.
Sometimes we all need help remembering and understanding who we are and why we are here.
We are relatives. We are always here. When you see us and when you do not. We are still here.
Even when our light already burned out and fell from the sky, we are still here. Even when your breath comes to an end and your existence expands beyond your body.
It’s the same.
We are here.
Together.
📷 @kailash_14r